Real programmers don't comment their code. If it was hard to write, it should be hard to understand."

Tech Support: "What does the screen say now." Person: "It says, 'Hit ENTER when ready'."Tech Support: "Well?" Person: "How do I know when it's ready?"

Tech support must get it all. We often feel sorry for them, until we're left on hold for three hours. TechTales is a collection of the dumbest computer mistakes, with audio re-enactments and the exclusive TechTales Tech Supporter, something every tech genius needs. From the woman who thought her computer was beeping (it was the office smoke alarm) to the demon that interupts e-mail, the tales reveal the sorry underside of the technological revolution. <http://www.techtales.com/>

Recently a group of computer scientists (all males) announced that
computers should be reffered to as being female. Their reasons for drawing
this conclusions follows:

Five reasons to believe computers are female -

1. No one but the Creator understands their logic.

2. The language they use to communicate with other computers is
incomprehensible to everyone else.

3. The message "Bad Command or File Name" is about as informative as, "If you don't know why I'm angry with you, then I'm certainly not goiing to tell you".

4. Even your smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for later
retrieval.

5. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.


Likewise a group of female computer scientists came up with reasons why
compters should be referred to as male.

Their five reasons:

1. They have alot of data, but are still clueless.

2. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they
are the problem.

3. As soon as you commit to one you realizethat, if you had waited a little longer, you could have obtained a better model with greater
capabilities.

4. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.

5. Big power surges knock them out for the rest of the night.

"I worked with an individual who plugged their power strip back
into itself and couldn't understand why his computer would not turn
on."

Microsoft Sex

Three women were in a bar talking about their husbands and how they made love. The first woman said, "My husband is a
marriage counselor, and before we make love, he brings me flowers and candy. I like that." The second woman proclaimed,
"My husband is a mechanic, he makes love a little rough. I like that." The third woman replied, "Well my husband works for
Microsoft and all he does is sit on the edge of the bed and tell me how good it's going to be when I get it."